Learning your baby’s cues

What are your baby’s cues and how do they help you know what they need?

Your baby gives you signals about how they feel and what they need. These signals are called cues. Some cues tell you that your baby is ready to interact. Other cues let you know that your baby needs a break or to rest. To figure out what the cues mean, look at what your baby is doing and what’s happening around them. Once you’ve learned to read your baby’s cues, you can better respond to their needs.

What cues tell you that your baby wants to interact?

Here are some cues that show your baby is ready to interact. If they:

• Are awake and alert
• Bring their hands or feet together
• Grasp someone’s finger or an object
• Put their hand on their ear, side of their face, or move their hand to the area around their mouth
• Move smoothly
• Open their eyes wide or try to follow a moving face or object
• Stay in a softly tucked position

Here are some ways to interact with your baby when they’re ready:

• Hold them
• Talk to them, read them a story or sing a song
• Give them a bath
• Change their diaper
• Feed them

If you have more than one baby, each baby may have different cues and may have their own way they like to be soothed.

What cues tell you that your baby needs a break?

Here are cues that show your baby needs a break. If they:

• Feel stiff or limp
• Stretch out their arms and spread their fingers wide apart (also called splaying) or push their hand out in a stop position
• Squirm, startle, or twitch more than usual
• Make fists or arch their back
• Avoid eye contact, turn their head away, or frown
• Have pale or blotchy skin
• Are fussing, crying, or spit up or choke

Here are some things you can do when your baby needs a break:

• Hold them
• Talk softly to them for a few minutes
• Swaddle them snugly, but not too tight, using a blanket
• Use a containment hold. This is when you gently hold your baby’s head and their tummy, bottom or feet. Ask the nurse to show you how.
• If you use a pacifier, give them one to suck on
• Place a rolled blanket or diaper near their feet so they can press against it
• Give them your finger to hold

Sometimes doing these things may be too much for your baby. They may need to be put in their bed in a quiet place with dim lights. If you can’t dim the lights, shade your baby’s eyes with your hand. Talk with your baby’s nurse about other ways to soothe them.

Last reviewed: April 2025